On this occasion, and with a new Tutor, the feedback was by video link and a written Tutor report. I must thank the new Tutor for stepping in at the last moment. My reflections on his comments are set out below. They are in the order appearing on the feedback.
Feedback on Assignment
Tutor: I understand your concern that the mood might be more sentimental than you’d like, but I certainly didn’t get the feeling of anything cloying or excessive.
Portraying the everyday objects treasured by a 97-year-old woman necessarily involves featuring some items that could be viewed as sentimental. Before submission, I did discuss this with friends who universally suggested that this Was not the case. So I was pleased when my tutor concurred. He also concurred with my decision not to include background music as he felt this certainly would have strayed into the realms of Sentimentality.
Tutor: I do wonder if the final piece could perhaps make a little more of its constituent parts. You’re definitely onto something that’s full of promise, but the various details of the work could be tweaked and/or other ways of presenting the work considered.
In particular, my tutor felt that the timeline presentation did not allow the viewer time to properly consider the images. He also felt that the zoom effect cropped the image unnecessarily, again affecting the viewer’s ability to understand the work. He suggested that I take the time available to me to consider alternative presentations, in particular the use of a digital book with written rather than spoken words.